My goodness, where did the beginning of this year go? I am sorry to leave you all hanging so long in 2016, but I’ve been busy with a few projects and even pursuing new challenges… more information on that to come soon, I promise!

In the meantime I thought I’d share a little article with you that has just been published on Houzz UK. You may remember me talking about them before — a super online magazine chock full of photographs by designers and home-owners from all over the world. The mind-boggling bevy of images is not just beautiful to look at, however, but also a pretty excellent way to start an interiors project. Search filters on the menu mean that you can sift out rooms of the house, style (from traditional to eclectic), size, price point and even geographical area. You can collect project inspiration in little folders called Ideabooks, and collaborate with a builder/designer/friend on them to share ideas. There are advice sections with helpful pointers from industry professionals, and discussion boards with people who may in the process of undertaking similar work to you, to share ideas and inspiration, or maybe even offer gems of advice with the benefit of hindsight before you embark.

So do give it a try. Let me know how you find your inspiration for home improvement solutions: do you buy magazines or browse on sites like Pinterest? Maybe you pick up good ideas when you’re out and about. Have you got any helpful tips to share about your design process?

And in the meantime, why not settle down to read my ode to the kitchen table. I am going to be contributing to Houzz regularly with some practical design advice — keep a look-out for me on there!

I thought you might like to take a little tour of an ensuite bathroom I designed recently. It was rather a pleasure, as my client wanted something with a bit of sparkle, which of course is a fun premise from which to create.

The bathroom was being newly built as part of an extension, so we had no existing plumbing layout to conform to, however there turned out to be obvious places for all the different elements in the room, once we’d allocated the shower area.

Whenever you’re thinking about a bathroom design, try and go for the largest possible shower space. It’s no fun bumping your elbows on the screen at every turn, or having to undertake extreme manoeuvres simply to apply your shampoo. The position of the doorway to this room carved out a clear area behind it for the shower to run along a side wall. After looking at a few walk-in screen options, and considering the splash potential, we decided to section off the whole thing with a flat sliding screen door.

holly ensuite shower window

Expand your showering horizons — give yourself some room

Once we had sorted out a location, we decided to line the shower area with some rather glamorous bronze-toned tiles from Walls and Floors. I don’t think this warm shade is in stock at the moment, but they’re from the Metalico range by Envy (their silver tile also looks rather glitzy, and for the dramatic, there’s a glamorous black one).

holly ensuite shower kit tiles corner

Warm tones in the walk-in shower/ Metalico Copper Tile

There is a huge range of prices for shower kits on the market. You don’t need to pay a great deal for something that looks impressive however. Keep to some simple guidelines and you can get the wow factor for less. Firstly, hidden workings can look swish, but tend to cost you more. The kits which have the workings (usually a horizontal bar) which control the thermostat on display are the most cost effective. Hidden workings need to be hidden, so often necessitate the creation of a false wall to hide them behind. And if things do go wrong further down the line, there’s a whole lot more excavation to get at them. Whereas if you need to replace your bar controls…. just swap them in for a new model. I often recommend clients to go to some of the trade-priced online stores for best deals on these. Plumbworld have often proved to offer a good selection. The one I sourced here is from Victoria Plum.

holly ensuite shower kit and tiles

Singing in the rain shower: Aria round head riser shower kit from VictoriaPlum.com

One of the best way to dress your windows in a shower or bathroom is with a wood-effect blind. The material is a composite plastic created to look like a wood slat but with none of the inevitable warping or mould growth. These dark wood effect blinds from 247 blinds are inexpensive and can be rotated shut for total privacy, turned to allow the light to filter through, or even drawn up completely.

holly ensuite shower tiles

Ecowood Sumatra blinds from 247blinds.com

It’s always nice to fit in a little storage to a bathroom if you can. The space around a sink is obviously an ideal opportunity, and there are some lovely modular units out there in pretty much any colour or shade you could imagine to fit your look. We decided to go for a dark brown wood drawer unit, which looks neat against the white ceramic, and complements the copper-themed tiles. On the wall, a mirror can serve as the door to more shelf space, and this nifty cabinet also has a socket to plug in shaving equipment or toothbrushes. The lights running down each side are LED with a warm glow. Perfect for ambient lighting on those tough early mornings….

holly ensuite basin tiles and cupboard

Odessa Wenge floor standing sink unit from Victoria Plum, and a mirrored wall cabinet with LED lighting from Illuminated Mirrors

Of course, the simplest splashback for your basin would be a couple of extras from the shower, but we wanted to liven up the look of the room, and found these delightful mosaic groups at Walls and Floors. Featuring hints of copper, greys and some jaunty patterns, these characterful tiles come as a set of 30cm-square designs which are ridiculously easy to fit. Two here span the width of the 60cm-wide basin.

holly ensuite basin shower background

Moroccan Riad mosaic tiles in Copper by Envy

With the subtle glitz from the tiles, we kept the walls white and used a light grey-brown wood effect vinyl plank for the flooring. Whilst brown is the dominant colour here, the room seems cheerful and fresh. Just a little glitter can make all the difference.

Let me know — what colour schemes would you consider for a bathroom? Do you prefer cool blues or natural tones of stone or wood? Some striking colour like green or red, or maybe a haven of grey? Do you like to add a touch of glamour in your fittings, or keep things muted?

Just a little mid-week treat for you all — this lovely woollen throw sold by The National Trust caught my eye. They feature it in on the front cover of their shop catalogue, draped in orderly fashion next to a rather louche gold blanket:

Why should the walls have all the fun/ Bronte by Moon Ochre Block Check Throw, exclusively made for National Trust

“C’mon, don’t be so square.” Gold louche fails to ruffle his neighbour/ Bronte by Moon’s Ochre Block Check Throw, made exclusively for National Trust

The autumnal golds and greys presented in neat squares are reminiscent of those rows of sample paints you daub onto the wall when you’re searching for that elusive shade for the living room. Only far more scientific.

A study in ochre

A study in ochre

Yellow has been popping up as a great accent colour recently, particularly to relieve the literal grey of so many of our interiors, bringing life and character to sombre room-scapes. That yellow is mainly of the canary or lemon variety, and doesn’t like blending in.

"Me! Me! Look at Me!" Yellow didn't like blending in/ lovely grey and yellow bedroom featured on The Hills Blog

“Me! Me! Look at Me!” Yellow was always trying to get noticed… Lovely  bedroom featured on The Hills Blog

Yep, yellow is great for loud and blowsy springtime and summer. Ochre, on the other hand, is just what you need when autumn arrives, and your decor is tired of all that bright and cheerful attention-seeking.

And so, this fine blanket. The greys, browns and muted ambers fit naturally with many a neutral scheme, and the fresh white framework running between ensures that nothing looks too sludgy or dark. Top notch production credentials (made with traditional techniques in a mill in Guiseley, Yorkshire) from soft lambswool mean that this throw is on every sofa’s wishlist.

Parents! Don’t take this the wrong way: I’m not trying to shame you. But so many people ask me about storage when they have kids, and I think to answer this you just have to take a long look at the floor and see what’s getting between your toes. Be reassured: I have very little interest in hoovering, so feel free to take a rather blurry look at the floor. We are focussing on the toyscape, not dust bunnies or muddy footprints: the ever-encroaching army of kids’ stuff that litters any free surface of our once-calm homes.

For everyone it’s different, but I’ll bet you can name at least one plaything that you would love to put in its place, and stop spending at least a significant proportion of your day tripping over.

For us it’s cars. Races, lines, complex combinations snaking around furniture and walls, with a high-pitched Murray Walker-style commentary and glorious shrieking engines.

Looks like an opportunity to overtake....

Looks like an opportunity to overtake….

Ever since Jonas was tiny, we’ve had to respect these lines, and the story behind them: the race isn’t over until the chequered flag waves.

Two races, two commentaries, too loud

Two races, two commentaries, too loud

In times when we’ve needed the floor to be clear, they’ve taken snapshots of the race for future re-enactments. That’s how I’ve got reams of these photos, blurry and wonky, but with crucial information contained within.

The M25 is a trifle congested today

The M25 is a trifle congested today

Even a brief dabble in ‘track’ building (Brio wooden railway)

Commuter chaos: leaves and a baked bean on the line

Commuter chaos: leaves and a baked bean on the line

normally ended up serving as a backdrop to another race.

“Could it be that we’ve taken a wrong turn somewhere? Maybe it wasn’t left after the chicane…”

I thought it would be helpful to share some of the best-loved and most successful storage items  — those which have got you through those years of ‘entire house as playroom.’

Our particular floor/sanity saver — one which has served us so well — has been a set of hinged, lidded wicker baskets with a calico liner (see above photo). With the cars tucked up safely inside for the night, these boxes looked rather attractive stacked in an unused fireplace in the living room of our first home. For the 18 months we spent in a (cosy/small) rental, they took up residence under a window next to the sofa. They didn’t look like kid furniture, so once the lid was shut, they blended right in. Now they live in Malachy’s bedroom — holder of the race mantle these days — and have lost their fabric innards at some point or another.

We bought the set of three from B&Q at a satisfyingly low price, and they’ve served us so well, but B&Q don’t do them any more. All I can do is point you in the direction of some other savvy outlets who still offer something similar. Remember, the hinged lid is the important bit for stacking. You want a box big enough to hold your stash of vehicles (nothing more frustrating at tidy-up time than a lid that doesn’t quite close: tantrums are made of this) but small enough for you to lug from room to room when needed. Also, and maybe this is a boy way of thinking, but toys seem to work best stored in families — ie cars in one box, trains in another; Playmobil in a big tub… I don’t know: where do Little Ponies prefer to hang out? In any case, they and all their equipment should be stabled together.

So in a spirit of great stowed generosity, I’ve compiled for you a list of the places you can still buy hinged lidded wicker baskets – so that you too can clear the clutter. You’re welcome.

In at Number One, with good looks and a reasonable price point is the offering from Wilkos:

Willow Grey storage hamper/ £8 Wilkos size 35 x 25 x 17cm

Willow Grey storage hamper/ £8 Wilkos size 35 x 25 x 17cm

If you’re looking at a more advanced case of toy invasion, or simply don’t have the floorspace free for any more furniture, how about tucking this friendly storage monster under the bed?

Underbed Storage Willow Grey/ from Wilkos at £20, 40 x 70 x 20 cm

Underbed Storage Willow Grey/ from Wilkos at £20, 40 x 70 x 20cm

George at Asda is on the case too, with this similar-looking basket. They call it a trunk, but don’t worry, it isn’t actually that huge. The price is reasonable too.

Vintage Style Storage Trunk/George at Asda £10, 40.5 x 30.5 x 22cm (or £6 for the smaller version at 31.5 x 20.5 x 13.5cm)

Vintage Style Storage Trunk/George at Asda £10, 40.5 x 30.5 x 22cm (or £6 for the smaller version at 31.5 x 20.5 x 13.5cm)

You’d have to shell out more at Homebase, but you do get three for your investment — one largish trunk and two bijous containers (easier for little hands to transport).

Natural Storage Chest plus two boxes/ Homebase £45.99, chest measuring 44 x 84 x 45cm and the small baskets neat cubes of 35cm

Natural Storage Chest plus two boxes/ Homebase £45.99, chest measuring 44 x 84 x 45cm and the small baskets neat cubes of 35cm

A stately offering from Muji with taller dimensions — a steeper price point too.

Rattan Box with Lid in X-Large/ Muji £20, 36 x 26 x 32cm

Rattan Box with Lid in X-Large/ Muji £20, 36 x 26 x 32cm

Finally, a couple of giant options — less wieldy, to be sure, but sometimes those collections do get rather large. This from Wilkos is a reasonable price for the size:

Wilko Storage Trunk in White/ £35 with hefty measurements at 59 x 42 x 40cm

Wilko Storage Trunk in White/ £35 with big bones at 59 x 42 x 40cm

And at the top end of our collection, Ikea brings you this sturdy trunk for the bulkiest items (I’m thinking Scalextric for this one: nice spacious garaging here).

Byholma Chest in grey/ Ikea at £65 for the sizeable dimensions of 72 x 50 x 50 cm

Byholma Chest in grey/ Ikea at £65 for the sizeable dimensions of 72 x 50 x 50 cm

How do you contain the chaos? I’ll bring you some more ideas in future posts, but in the meantime, I’d love to hear your tidy-up time solutions!

It’s always exciting to see a design come to life. A few weeks ago I popped round to Holly’s kitchen to see how she was getting on now everything has been built and installed. You might remember our neat little pairing of Bodbyn grey and Brokhult wood-effect which I told you about in pick and mix — now they’re nestled together and established, and it’s time to show you the results.

As you might remember, we chose grey for the doors and drawer-fronts, and end-panel pieces in faux wood. The wood brings a warmth to the mix, and stops the grey from feeling too stark.

Standing sentry

Standing sentry

A tall cabinet is a great home for those extra items you don’t always allow space for: broom, mop, even the hoover. This one fits snug between a wall buttress and a door. Cheaper than getting a carpenter to build the cupboard from scratch, and with all the useful internal fittings that come with Ikea kitchen units.

The contrast of materials is best displayed in the wall of storage we created to surround the fridge. In expensive high-end (modern rather than traditional) kitchens you often get a block of cabinets encased in a framework of eye-catching wood.

Fridge cosy

Fridge cosy

You can recreate this effect with Ikea units by using either side panels and a top cornice, or for a more chunky wraparound, re-purpose a ready-made wooden worktop. Here in Holly’s kitchen there was a limited amount of space between the doorway and the window wall, so we chose to maximise the storage options and go for the slimmer panels.

The neutral shades of the cabinetry meant that we weren’t trapped with one colour scheme for the room. Holly opted for a slate-effect worktop, black cooker hood and a gleaming black splashback.

Bold in black

Bold in black: extractor fan from Ikea, now discontinued (but black hoods in other designs are still in stock); black glass splashback from Cheadle Glass; Duropal Welsh Slate worktop from Plasman

In contrast, the blinds are a perky deckchair stripe in mustards, greys and whites.

Shades of colour

Shades of colour: Ashanti Antique roller blind from 247 Blinds

The windowsill above the sink lends a cheerful aspect onto the garden — plants thrive on both sides of the glass.

Shades of colour

Showcase your shrubs – what kitchen windowsills are there for. Tap is called ‘Palazzo’ from Mayfair.

Most of the walls are painted white, but this feature wall in a bright teal brings a colourful jauntiness to the room.

Teal wall

Teal: on the warm and cheerful end of the blues spectrum

Of all the features in this room, perhaps my favourites are these marbled lights floating above the table:

Cool grey veins

Cool grey veins: BHS Nala pendant lights, heartbreakingly no longer available in store (but you might find them on eBay if you’re lucky)

A translucent and delicate pair when turned off, and warmly glowing when on:

Illumination transformation

Illumination transformation

Light up your life

Light up your life

This kitchen has come together in a vibrant way, full of personality and warmth. I love the way the cabinet pairing works — and that Holly didn’t need to spend a fortune to do it. It’s made me wonder what other excellent combinations you could create if you think just a little outside the box. It’s certainly worth exploring beyond the suggestions presented on the pages of a catalogue or in basic showroom designs in store, and see where these ideas take you. Who knows what bespoke discoveries you might dream up!

Would you like to see some of the sights from the Ideal Home Show Manchester? We went last month: all sorts of exhibitors congregate there, from one-product entrepreneurs with innovative new gadgets, to established retailers with glamorous room displays.

Going to design shows is great fun (not least for the generous freebies to be snaffled at the food stalls). I don’t think events like this exactly set interiors trends — furniture, colours, decor. To identify burgeoning creative ideas you really need to keep an eye online and all around you: Pinterest, Instagram and magazines; quirky blog pages and house tours. But exhibitions can show you what has passed the consumer test — a place to check out which products and designs are proven or emerging commercial successes in the interiors market.

So here are just a few of my favourite discoveries:

Lighting was still big, glitzy and sparkling.

Lighting was glitzy and sparkling. The statement pendant is certainly not going anywhere for a while.

The statement pendant is certainly not going anywhere for a while

Populate your sofa. The tidy way.

Don't have time for a pet? Got allergies? Now you can live the sofa dream with these endearing cushions. (They don't bring in unidentified small mammal body parts to your house, either).

Don’t have time for a pet? Got allergies? Now you too can live the cat lady dream with these endearing cushions. (They don’t bring in unidentified small mammal body parts to your house, either)

We loved the nautical rope lamp from Arrighi Bianchi.

Aye-aye cap'n. We loved the nautical rope lamp from Arrighi Bianchi

Aye-aye cap’n

On which note…

I love Macclesfield furniture store Arrighi Bianchi's picture. Like a dolls' house, only real

I love Macclesfield furniture store Arrighi Bianchi’s picture. Like a dolls’ house, only real

When your furniture is multi-purpose and cute.

On the lookout for flexible extra seating/tables? Goat Hide Stool from Rockett St George would fast become one of the family

On the lookout for flexible extra seating/tables? Goat Hide Stool from Rockett St George would fast become one of the family

We just can’t stay away from wallpaper.

We just can't stay away from wallpaper. This clever stuff from 1wall.com can be applied in A4-sized sheets in whichever layout you choose. Clever

The Creative Collage range from 1wall.com comes in A4-sized sheets to be applied in whichever layout you choose. Clever

Another 1wall.com Creative Collage design: empty frames. Would you keep them empty? Pin postcards inside them? Let your kids go wild with crayons?

Another 1wall.com Creative Collage design: empty frames. Would you keep them empty? Pin postcards inside them? Let your kids go wild with crayons?

Taking the safer path to relaxation.

There's something a little endearing about these flickery fake candles. Surely a breakthrough design for so many health and safety nightmares

There’s something a little endearing about these flickery fake candles. Surely a breakthrough design for so many public event health and safety liability reports

What do you think of my little list? Anything here you’d go for?

After a shaky start, Manchester’s version of June seems to finally have attained the correct sunshine levels. We are all emerging, blinking, into the bright light and zinging colours.

Check out, for example, the view that Lotus woke up to this morning:

View from the cat's door

View from the cat’s door

What a treat! I hope she’s grateful.

And as you might remember, our utility room glazed door is visible as soon as you enter the house from the front:

View from the back door

View from the back door

Somehow with the sunshine, the colours in the garden burst out, a little like someone had got trigger happy with the brightness contrast sliders on Photoshop. (Which I haven’t, it’s simply natural).

#nofilter

#nofilter

I’m actually showing off this side of the garden because the other side, more functionally, is a football pitch. Whereas in the house we tend to merge our form and function elements so that useful items are also beautiful, the garden demonstrates a more segregated approach of ball-game-yin aside herbaceous-border-yang.

Games-side of the garden. Adjudicating their own boules game, earlier in the Springtime

Business side of the garden. Adjudicating their own boules game, earlier in the springtime

Whilst I appreciate the usefulness of the pitch, I have to say that the flower beds fill me with more of a sense of calm and well-being. This is good news, because I doubt that the flower beds feel this way. They have withstood quite a barrage of mis-directed shots to flourish so abundantly. I feel we could market these supershrubs as the true survivors of the garden world.

Only the strong survive

Only the strong survive

Wielding a broom. The red plant in the foreground has blossomed oblivious to penalty knock-backs

The red plant in the foreground – broom – has blossomed oblivious to penalty knock-backs

The swanky trellis which features in many an urban garden also serves to deflect missiles back onto the pitch, reducing our neighbours’ ball-retrieval duties by I’d guess around 80%.

Wall trellis saves many a lost football

Wall trellis saves many a lost football

If this weather continues, we’ll have to demand our table back from the little seedlings and strawberry plants currently squatting atop. Yesterday’s barbecue was fun sitting on the picnic rug but I don’t think that setting would suit a more formal occasion.

Potting shed al fresco

Potting shed al fresco

Let’s hope June continues with such a positive attitude. Things do look so much better in the sun.

Glorious sun picks out the colours

Glorious sun picks out the colours

What do you do when you’re trying to ignore an important job that needs to be done? Something like a tax return or a large project that you really should get started on?

Everyone has their displacement activities: I practise my flute diligently or cook complex and time-consuming meals. Tim tidies.

It occurred to me that in fact, one person’s important job could well be another person’s displacement activity. I hate tidying, and will find practically anything to do rather than that, but Tim is drawn to it like a magnet.

So much so, that this has happened:

When there's a job to be done... hundreds of others will be done first (Ancient Domestic Proverb)

When there’s a job to be done… hundreds of others will be done first (Ancient Domestic Proverb)

Yes. A number of the shelves have been arranged by gradated colour. We have fiction books, non-fiction books and CDs. So far.

There are downsides to living with a very tidy person, but that’s for another day. Let’s celebrate the ordered mind with this lovely creation.

And again, I believe we can put those wallpaper plans on hold.

Our music room, as you may remember, was almost completely finished last year: the shelving went up, the rug went down, the boxes of CDs and books were emptied and rehoused.

Everything in its place

Everything in its place

Dark woods make it cosy

Dark woods make it cosy

There were however a couple of things which we put on hold until we could amass further inspiration/finance. One was wallpaper for the chimney breast wall, and the other was a statement pendant light.

Because Tim likes large drum-style shades, I bought him this lovely shade from Ikea:

Ikea's NYMÖ shade in wine red and copper

Ikea’s NYMÖ shade in wine red and copper

It’s large (59cm diameter) and a warming pinkish red which incidentally fits perfectly with our Kattrup rug:

Kattrup warms the boards

Kattrup warms the boards

We also invested in a longer cord to bring the pendant down a little. Lowering your lighting works really well in rooms where you would like to create a gentle atmosphere with light pools rather than a bright flood — which is, granted, functional but can be rather stark. The cord set from Ikea, Sekond, was only £4, and runs to 180cm if you need it. We set the base of our shade just a little higher than the tallest person we know, and despite our high ceilings the room feels instantly cosier when the light is on.

But perhaps the most exciting thing about this new light is this:

Pattern springs forth

Pattern springs forth

The perforated shade creates a fabulous retro pattern on all the walls — who needs wallpaper now?!

Magic lantern

Magic lantern

We have a warm glow from the central light — reflecting brightly against the copper inside — and the walls are also lit up with images.

Playing with shadows

Playing with shadows

With our shelving lighting aglow, the contrasts of light and dark are heightened.

Now our lighting is getting really interesting

Now our lighting is getting really interesting

As statement lighting goes, this really does fit the bill. We have created a touch of coppery glamour, some magic lantern inspiration, and instant cosiness at the cost of £35 for a shade.

So, are we done here? Well I still think that this room can take a standard lamp in the corner near the armchair, and possibly a simple desk lamp for focussed work. But we may park the wallpaper plans for a while.

Caspar is sad. He’s normally really happy all the time, and can find a cheerful positive slant on nearly any misfortune or drudgery. So it’s a bit of a shock when he gets sad, and also very hard to predict.

The last time he got sad (apart from when Manchester United lose against anyone) was when we had to do the inter-seasonal clothes transfer, and handed down his old winter coat to Malachy. I had pre-empted the potential emotional descent by buying Caspar a really nice, new, RED coat (team colours) which was extremely cosy.

But it wasn’t the Old Coat and Malachy was very victorious in his inheritance.

It took a lot of time and diplomacy to make it ok.

Then, the little glass bedside light in Caspar’s room got smashed. No-one quite knows how, but it left a nasty shard-like edge on display, which was just too tempting to fiddle with, and so I went on a search for a replacement — little knowing the distress that awaited.

Here is the lovely light which I got.

Lekaryd LED light in red. Part bedside light, part gaming icon

Lekaryd LED light in red. Part bedside light, part gaming icon, part small item storage

I had browsed the Ikea website with Caspar a few days before and we liked the look of this because it looks a bit like Pacman — you can open and shut its mouth by sliding the top up and down. In addition, the lower section has a little hollow which is perfect for keeping teeth in for the tooth fairy (and also toenails for the toenail fairy but that’s another story). Also, as you can see, it is RED. What’s not to like?

Well, apparently, a lot.

I had not learnt my lesson from New Coat-gate and blithely introduced New Lamp with a big ceremonial plug-in at bedtime. Caspar’s face was stony and glum. I pointed out the little tooth/toenail hollow. He turned his head away and stared soulfully at the remains of Old Lamp.

“What are you going to do with my old light, Mum?” he asked quietly.

“Oh, well, I suppose I could put the glass in the recycling if I’m careful, and the rest of it will just go in the bin.” My voice had taken on a brittle, sensible tone.

But Caspar didn’t want to say a proper “goodbye” to Old Lamp. He wanted it to rest in the cellar with all the less-loved toys and the cardboard boxes and the camping equipment. He felt that would be less final. I was concerned about that jagged edge lurking in the cellar for an unsuspecting child to discover.

So we compromised. We decided that the heart of a lamp is its bulb.

Now you can see the read me...

Now you can see the real me…

That the outer shell is simply armour, clothing which you can replace or discard.

Don't judge a lamp by its shade. Even if the shade is not fit for purpose and frankly dangerous

Don’t judge a lamp by its shade. Especially if the shade is not fit for purpose and frankly dangerous

The lamp still remains a lamp if you have the light bulb and socket.

I'm still a lamp

I’m still a lamp

And so it does remain, nestled safely in the lightbulb box down in the cellar, enjoying its retirement in peaceful darkness.

A tooth came out the other day. We celebrated by hiding it in the tooth/toenail section of the lamp, and the tooth fairy was remarkably (uncharacteristically) prompt with her visitation. Maybe a New Lamp isn’t all bad.

*With thanks to @MYSADCAT for the inspiration

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